Just over a week ago, I arrived in Bandung and in the long weekend I met some of my dearest friends. Turns out there are so many stories about their life that surprised me (to say the least).
But first, let me just say that the trip to the US was amaziiinnnngggg~~~. I loved every seconds of it. That was June, my sister Dania, and I at Boeing (The Future of Flight) after the awesome tour. I saw how the plane was assembled and the big building they stored the plane in. Just one word: awesome.
Living abroad for quite some times has taught me many many things.
 First and foremost is that life is such a fragile thing. It just is. You’re building all these relationships with many different people, just to realise that at some point, some of them will always dissapoint you. It is your choice to let go of that said individual (or adjust your expectation for the said individual), or keep gripping the person tight, hoping that maybe, maybe someday they will change and you won’t get hurt anymore.
But here’s the thing. The only person who can hurt you is actually just yourself. As Regina (Once Upon A Time) said, “Evil is not born, it is made”. The same concept goes to the feeling of hurt. You made your heart hurt yourself by overthinking things that maybe super mundane and not at all important.
I know I know all the chant ‘but I cannot stop thinking about it’. I know all about that. I was there. I let myself hurt myself pretty badly at some occasion. But I learnt to stop. Just try to sing the ‘Let It Go’ from Disney’s Frozen with an open heart.
Some of my best friends in Indonesia are going through rough patches in their life. Be it a bad breakup, or bad relationship with a member of the family, or the fear to open his/herself up to a new possibilities that may have a happy ending.
There is only one thing I learnt after all this time.
Whatever your life throws at you, it is YOUR own decision to be happy, to be sad, to be hurt, or to be an arse.
Others may talk to you until they want to slap some senses into you. Others may just look at you with pity in their eyes. Others may just giving you this dirty looks that said ‘what the hell are you doing with your life?’
Well, I say to hell to all of them. It is my life. I am the grand designer of my life (well, not me per se but more like God, but you get my point, right?).
I choose to be happy.
That is a choice nobody can ever take from you. No matter what.
 Second lesson. I learnt to not take anybody for granted. I know if you’re my friend you shall say ‘haha but you did Ness’ and I admitted that I sometimes did that. But you all know how hard it is to stay in touch if you have this other things on your mind that needs more attention than anything else.
So by ‘not take anybody for granted’, what I really meant was to ‘enjoy and cherish the moment’ you are in. You may only be able to feel that special feelings once in your life and never again. Or maybe it will conjure up courage that you never knew you had. I experienced all that. Afterall, my best friend is myself. I always do talk to myself (Okay, now I sound super crazy). When you’re alone out there, there’s so many good things happen and you can see the wonder of the world because there’s no one to distract you from seeing, and beliving.
 Life goes on. It just does. No matter what you’re going through in your life right now, it doesn’t mean the world stop evolving. Au contraire, the world’s pace just got a lot faster when you’re not looking. Friends’ kids growing up, parents started to have grey hair when you’re not looking, your kid sister become wiser, your friends become more of an arse (sorry to say but that’s true to some cases), your big sister may be preparing for your wedding, waiting for a nephew/niece to come to the world an in a blink of an eye he/she can talks back to you, et cetera.
So I’m back to the point of ‘choose wisely‘. For some bad breakup, do you not want to move on, to just make this a learning point, and find some happiness that waits for you in the end of the road? For some family member, do you not know what your brother/sister want in their life? If you don’t, why don’t you try to find out. The answer may surprises you. For those of you with a whole lot of fears and uptightness, do you not want to feel happiness, may be just for once in your life, to know the meaning of being happy?
Life is what you define it with your mind. That is why you can choose to be happy, or not.